Confession time: I’m a hoarder.

Like a bad one. But I have seen the error of my ways and I am working sincerely and passionately to correct that. This is one of the many reasons I decided to start a blog in the first place.

That, and I’m incredibly bored at home and thought that those of you in cyber space needed to hear my self-indulgent internal monologues.

What CAN’T be Used Somehow

Anyways, as I said before, I’m a pretty bad hoarder. Most of it is the mentality of “everything can be used somehow.” It comes from a good place, from my parents always reusing and recycling things. I knew about craigslist from the tender age of five (though not its infinite uses), and thought it was a sin to buy a new car. As much as I would like to still believe in this, I don’t. Mostly because I’m only twenty-something and have managed to amass an entire second-level U-haul truck’s worth of shit.

As you might have noticed from reading my previous blog posts, I am quite verbally flatulent. In this case, my descriptor, “shit,” is actually the best representation of my stuff that I could come up with. This year is the first time I ever actually did an audit of what I carry around with me from apartment to apartment.

It’s also the first time that I realized I wasn’t using my fancy (read: craigslist) bookshelves properly. They were gorgeous, finished nice and dark, and were used as if they were basement storage shelves for dog food, books I will never read, and random things that I will never use nor give away, such as old change, coffee-stained post it pads, and index cards from college classes I hated. I threw out 75% of it, reorganized my bedroom storage bins, and got rid of my two gorgeous bookshelves with a nice ROI of 166%, to a nice man in a tiny car who seemed like he would appreciate them more than I ever could.

Contestant Minimalists

A lot of anti-minimalist rhetoric focuses on the aspect of minimalism that is having the least amount of stuff while still existing with a heartbeat. Sure, that’s one way to do it, but I think minimalism in its purest and most popular form is having only the things you need, “need” being defined loosely for the purposes of Minimalism.

Because lets face it, having three pairs of underwear and a smartphone isn’t about minimalism – it’s a big dick contest to see who can live with less stuff, and that, if I may opine briefly (ha), is the exact opposite of what minimalism is about.

The minimalists who are a part of this contest are the ones who have to buy new cough medicine every time they get a cold, and live off packaged rice or take out. Yes, of course these minimalists are going to end up spending much more than most others, because they are only minimizing their stuff, not their lifestyle.

Obligatory disclaimer: if you are a big-dick-contest Minimalist, I’m only judging you a little bit. You, of course, should practice any sort of minimalism that makes you happy. You, of course, should also probably start seeing a therapist.

Minimalism & Cases of Emergency

Minimalism as I see it, fits in with simple living, as you might be able to tell from the way I have structured this blog. My goal for my eventual minimalist lifestyle is to keep only the things that I find necessary, the things I use regularly, and the things that truly bring me happiness. Also, and perhaps most importantly, the things that are really good to have in a crunch.

Cough medicine. An extra fork. Knitting needles. Candles. Spare food/water. Tools. Comfy clothing. An extra phone charger. Alcohol.

You may think that some of these are unnecessary, but I based my list off of one scenario, really: you have a wicked bad cold and blow a fuse. Suddenly all of these things are potentially very useful and potentially very necessary.

So if you’re still wondering what my point is, I think it was probably that minimalism should not be an excuse to disregard what you would need in an emergency. If you are foregoing basic survival needs, you’re doing it wrong. You’re also doing it expensively.

Minimalism as a Key to a Fat Wallet

The way to minimize the right way is again, to have only what you need. So for me, that meant donating a ton of clothes and throwing out a ton of excess crap I lugged around with me for years. Sure, that doesn’t exactly sound like saving money, but the way it effected me is what led to my fat wallet (maybe not fat but at least pleasantly temporarily plumper than usual).

The clothes I donated freed up room in my closet, which allowed me to use some of that storage for other things that never found a proper place. While rearranging, I was able to fit my heavy coats in with my regular clothing, as well as free up room underneath my bed that I could use for books and sentimental things.

Lo and behold, I had an empty coat rack and two empty bookshelves. That, my friend, is how my wallet got an extra $120 dinner. That ROI I mentioned previously comes into play when I take into account the price for those two bookshelves, the matching tv stand (which I still have), and the coat rack, came out to around $80 all together.

So you say, that’s a one-time solution. How is that indicative of cost saving in the long run? What about replacing your clothes, your books?

I’m not doing either. I had so much stuff before that I’m putting a hard cap on my closet and storage – if something goes in, something has to come out. Luckily, most of my stuff comes from craigslist or discount/secondhand stores, so the perceived value is much lower than other closets.

This mindset helps as a deterrent from buying new stuff. So, not only did I get rid of some storage and make a little money, but I also limited the amount of stuff I can actually have. Now when I go to a store and want something, it has to be directly loved more than something else already in my closet. If I can’t think of something I would willingly give away, it’s just not worth it.

From Hoarding & Emotional Shopping to Minimalism

The last part of my minimalism-born money-saving is from recognizing what you will actually use. A reddit user recently asked how to deal with emotional shopping, and I thought, damn, that is the perfect question.

Because aren’t hoarding and emotional shopping each other’s facilitators and a destructive combination?

I’m a small person that comes with a whole lot of stuff, as my boyfriend painfully found out when he suggested we borrow a van and move my stuff by ourselves, rather than paying to rent a van and/or movers. I think his exact words were, “NEVER AGAIN.”

So a hoarder and an emotional shopper. You’d think, alright, well as long as you’re churning through whatever you get, you’re fine, right?

No. Nobody churns that fast. Nobody.

So my advice is to start with one and the rest of the minimalist lifestyle will fall into place. Once you start getting rid of stuff, it will become more and more painful to replace it with stuff that’s of the same quality or use. Once you put a hard stop on your spending, it’ll be that much harder to justify keeping that crappy skirt you got three years ago just because it was cheap.

These things have a way of rounding each other out, reinforcing a lifestyle that allows you to stick to what you really love.

It didn’t happen for me all at once, and I personally had to start throwing stuff out before I could truly appreciate the stuff that I kept. Other people will tell you the opposite. But I can truly say that at least 75% of what I have now is either useful or truly makes me happy.

And you know what I’ve been thinking of this entire time?

The black long sleeve I wore last weekend. Cut out back, demure but sexy still. I want to be buried in that shirt. Yet that tribal print thing I got from walmart three years ago? Why the F is that still allowed in my closet? Really, what was I thinking?

The things you love in life will find either a place in your heart or a place in your life.

As you re-familiarize yourself with your stuff, the things that you love will pop out, as well as the things you hate. It’s taking a long time for me to go through everything, but almost everyday I can find something that’s not worth dragging along with me anymore. And everyday I get to love what stays with me, even more.